Michele Fortin is living through every mother’s nightmare.
Her precious son, Philippe, went missing at just 23 years old on August 21, 2002. Her tireless efforts to find him have not ceased, even after receiving a death certificate from the Coroner.
“But there is no body, so we can’t give up hope,” Michele said.
“From that day on [when Philippe went missing] life has never been the same and never can be unless our son returns safe and sound.
“I live for that day but there are no guarantees it will come to pass.
“Even now after more than nine years there is still a part of me that can’t quite grasp the reality that he is missing.
“How could this have happened? Will I ever see my darling boy again in this life?
“The mind asks questions continually but there are never any real answers, just suppositions which swirl around in your head leaving you dizzy and no further advanced.”
Michele contacted the Port Macquarie Independent newspaper in a final and desperate plea as to information on Philippe’s whereabouts.
She said in July 2007 her daughter was contacted by “a woman who has a pie shop in the shopping centre at Port Macquarie”.
“The centre is linked with the Panthers’ club,” she said.
“This person had worked with our daughter in Sydney at the time of Philippe’s disappearance and had a poster of our son so she was familiar with his appearance.
“She was sure she had served him.
“She asked him where he lived and he replied around here but before she could ask him any other questions he had gone.
“The woman then commun-icated with our daughter who spoke to me. Our daughter then rang me.
“I suggested she contact the police to notify them of this possible sighting.
“The police officer handling the case in Liverpool then spoke to a detective in Port Macquarie.
About two weeks later on July 22 my husband Bernard and I, drove up to Port Macquarie and spoke to the woman and also went to the police station.
“The police were not aware of the sighting.”
Michele said she still looks for her son Philippe in crowds, on trains, in passing cars and “on several occasions I thought I saw him on the television”.
“Once when sitting at the back of the church the young priest even looked like him,” Michele said.
“The mind plays some terrible tricks.
“There are many triggers that bring thoughts and memories of Philippe every day.
“Seeing other young people about his age or someone with a short haircut like his or just seeing a small child can bring back memories of him.
“Thoughts of him are always just under the surface.
“Sometimes I can think of him with a smile but at other times the tears flow.
“They say time heals but for me there will always be the pain of his absence and the pain of not knowing where he is or if he is still alive.
“I need resolution.”
Michele said coping with the loss of a son is a daily activity.
“How do I cope? I’m not sure but I know it is either sink or swim so I try to swim as best I can with the skills that I have and the help of others who support me,” she said.
“Prayer helps me a lot as does the kindness and understanding of friends who know to some degree what it means to have a loved one missing.
Michele said before Philippe became a missing person she had never really thought about “Missing Persons” and I don’t remember the National Missing Persons Week in 2002 which was only three weeks prior to his disappearance.
“Now I am so aware of missing and all that ‘missing’ entails,” she said.
“When Philippe first went missing I would lie awake at night wondering if he had a warm place to sleep and enough to eat.
“As time passed the anxiety was still there but the concern for food and warmth eased as I believed time would have given him the chance to organise himself.
“In the early days whenever there was an announcement that a body had been found, immediately I was concerned it could be Philippe.
“Nowadays if I hear remains have been located I have that same terrible feeling of panic.
“Could it be Philippe? Is it male or female, about what age and is the location realistic?
“As the years pass and doubts set in, as they do from time to time, hope still remains.
“The human mind will not let go of the last thread of hope even if one tries.
“I cannot let go of hope and I wait for Philippe to return.”
At the time of Philippe’s disappearance he was described as having short brown hair, a thin build and brown eyes.
If you have any information about Philippe Fortin, please contact his mother, Michele, on
0417 247 975.
Story: Kate Yates
